By Jilly Cooper
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Extra resources for Harriet
She was in such a state she washed her face twice, cut herself three times shaving her legs, and then got back into the bath to wash between her toes in case Simon was the sort of man who kissed one all over. Then she rubbed her landladys hand-cream all over her body and smothered herself in French Fern talcum powder. In the bedroom, she examined herself naked in the mirror. Were the goods good enough? Her bust was much too big. But men didnt seem to mind that. Her legs were all right except for the bleeding, but everywhere else was a bit voluptuous.
I always dreamed Id fall in love with someone tall and dark. �I am not small, said Simon icily. She knew by the idle drumming of his fingers on the bedside table that thered be trouble, that hed bide his time and then retaliate without scruple. He started to read a piece about some famous actors sex life. When he came to the end he said: �Thats why I want to make it to the top. Apart from telling Buxton Philips to get stuffed, just think of the birds one could pull. There was a pause.
Its not dangerous any more, darling. You dont want to listen to any of those old wives tales. Dr. Wallace is a pro. Harriet winced. �Borzois been to him twice, said Simon. So have Chloe and Deirdre and Anne-Marie and Henrietta. �But I dont want Harriet began. �But itll be so expensive. �Oh dont worry about that, darling; Ill treat you. Im not that much of a sod. Do you mind Nescafé? He poured boiling water into two cups and handed one to her. �If you like, he went on, putting two saccharine into his cup, Ill ring old Wallace now, and fix you up an appointment.